Elephant in the Room

 

Silver Ganesh in Chaing Mai

While in Asia, I became mildly obsessed with the need to own a Ganesh statue to bring home. We left most of our shopping to our last 3 days in Bangkok; which in hindsight was not enough time. I despaired at the end that I hadn't found the Ganesh that spoke to me, but resigned myself to the fact that it was one item not coming home with me.

Our flight home began in the wee early morning, so the night before we spent packing our purchases until after midnight. With 3 of us, we packed for getting things home in one piece front of mind rather than who's stuff went in which bag.

While going through every pocket of my pack to see what I had, I found a very small brass Ganesh that I forgot I'd bought at a temple in Cambodia for $1 from a woman who looked like she needed the $1 way more than I did.

Wondola, wondola, wondola… (you have to have been there to understand what this means).

Terrace of the Elephants
Angkor Watt, Siem Reap, Cambodia

I read recently that “(Ganesh) is the Lord of success and destroyer of evils and obstacles. He is also the god of education, knowledge, wisdom and wealth,” according to About.com.

Perfect God for someone looking for work.

This morning, I went to the EnchantedForest website to choose an animal spirit to help me with my job search.

I did a similar thing last year around the subject of self-love and the forest gave me Squirrel. At the time, I thought WTF? Squirrel?
Over time though I came to understand just how perfect Squirrel was for me as a learning tool for self-love.

Today, the Enchanted Forest gave me Elephant to help with my job search. It told me, "You are a tower of strength. Your heart is full of courage and you know that you can do and be anything you care to. After all, you are the elephant."

Wall post with elephants, Chaing Mai

It goes on, but you get the picture.

Maybe because I was raised without formal religion I see no harm in taking strength from Ganesh and the Enchanted Forest website in equal parts to lift me up and set me on my way with a spring in my step. Who is to say which of these elephants will lend me the strength I need to find the work I want for now.

Two Things

Two things: environment matters and a comfortable mold will lurk for a while even after you think you’ve broken free.

Recently, I allowed myself to slip back into my comfortable mold of The Mother.

The person responsible for the efficient, socially respectable and tidy management of a home and family.

Dictator Mom at your service!

That’s the old role where I can’t afford to be warm and fuzzy because I’m too busy making sure the structure doesn’t crumble around us and allow the worst to happen.

It’s an attitude where you are convinced that life is a slippery slope and it is only by clenching that you can maintain order and survive.
I had returned to clenched. Actually, until today I hadn’t realized just how clenched I can get. I must have spent years like that in my old life!

Only when I changed environments did I see the truth of what I was doing. For me, my immediate environment has the capacity to affect my mindset. I need empty space around me.

Years ago, I read that Sagittarians need space around them so much that when they sit down at a table set for dinner, they will immediately push away the utensils, dishes etc. to make a space in front of them. I do that and, yes, I am Sagittarian.

I like empty spaces in my home, in my neighborhood and in my view.  No wonder I liked my Little House on the Prairie; it had views all the way to the sunrise.

Right now, I’m in a place of space and quiet. I can hear my spirit here. Today, I heard it tell me to chose faith and a spirit of adventure. Okay!!!

I spent a few hours today clipping branches and sawing big sticks.

I’m going to have a big, full moon fire tonight!

I may even howl!